Buh ByeHow Sexy Can This Get?
By Mark
Sexuality. Sex. Insertion.
No, I haven’t gone soft core on you (although I may in order to bring in a wider audience base). These are all important terms in regards to something I hold very dear to me, on a daily basis. I’m not talking human sexuality… and no, no animals either…
I am talking about Cable Sexuality. Yup, cables. Cords. Wires. Your headphones are like a dude, just trying to get some tunes. Your ipod is just a hot babe, looking to put out. This may seem silly, but as most of you know cable connectors and terminations are classified as either male or female, staying literal to their definitions. Male connectors have one or more poles that make a connection in the female connection sleeve. Great.
I was inspired to write this after an encounter at work recently. I was minding my own business when this cable connector was brought to my attention. I was like ‘what is that?!’… is it male?? is it female??
It’s both! …It is the hermaphroditic cable connector! Yes folks, that is the official classification in the wire biz’. Hermaphroditic. This of course is pretty cool because any end can connect into any other end, which is nice. However we’ll save discussing the merits of cable connections for another day! Today is all about sex!!
To celebrate sex, lets get back on the hetero-cable side of things, after that brief lapse. For those looking to beef up their sex-abulary, you are welcome to start using cable references to human sexuality. What could be more sexy than in the heat of the moment using terms such as ‘plug’, ‘prong’, or ‘pin’ for the male genitalia, or ’socket’, ‘receptacle’, or ‘outlet’ on the female side of the anatomy.
What kind of action do these sexy cables get up to? Well lets take a look!
This poor guy is stuck in the friendzone! He hangs out with four females all day, but unfortunately they will never hook up. They just want him to be there for him at all times. Females can be so needy sometimes!
Our good friend XLR is a little shy and keeps his ‘poles’ hidden. He’s playing it safe, knowing that Ms. XLR will come along sometime. It looks here like some sparks are about to fly as Ms. XLR (on left) has her sockets out in the open, making XLR know for sure that if he wants it, he can have it. Ms. XLR looks like a slut, to be honest. Don’t worry, she isn’t, she just like to show off.
When double, triple, and even quadruple penetration just aren’t enough, you’ve got LPT. This ancient form of extreme multiple penetration is rarely performed anymore. Kinda like the mustache ride, its really a lost art.
Hello gang bang! Looks like our XLR friends and the TRS folk have gotten together for a little bit of hot-swapping and exhibitionism. Self explanatory.
The coaxial legend, BNC, has lots of toys to play around with. BNC always ensures a safe durable connection, however with limited capabilities. Sometimes it can be hard to get off.
What kind of cable sex blog would be complete without a gratuitous appearance by the Banana plug! Shown above the male banana plug is getting a pretty graphic grounding job (GJ) courtesy of a pretty shiny looking ground pin with a hint of subtle homocable tension
Friendzones, safe durability, gang bang, multiple-penetration and GJ’s. I think I’ve taken this ridiculous premise far enough… for today!
Mark @ December 13, 2007
I feel dirty, this should be tagged NSFW.
It seems that “pin” would be a term a male would want to avoid. At least when referencing himself. You can say anything you want about other guys.
Incredibly sophomoric.